Saturday, March 29, 2008

A New Reality

And so we find ourselves living in a new reality. Not the reality we anticipated as expectant parents, but the reality of parents who have lost a child. The reality that became ours the moment my doctor pointed at the ultrasound and said, "There's her little heart, but it's not beating." And there it was, two small black circles that we had seen many times before, but this time they were not pulsing, pumping blood through Cara's little body. They were lifeless.

Our precious Cara Grace was born March 18, 2008 at 8:52 am, 5 lbs 15 ounces, 19 inches. She was absolutely beautiful with Tim's nose and thick dark hair.

We'll always remember the time we had with Cara that day. We held her, stroked her soft little cheeks, played with her hands. But it was only a day, and now we are discovering how to live a lifetime without her. Tim sang the song "Simple Gifts" to her the evening we had to say good-bye and later we had this song played at her funeral. We feel it completely embodies her life and death. She never had to taste a breath of this world and now lives a full, complete life with our Father. She was simple and beautiful.

Simple Gifts

'Tis the gift to be simple, 'tis the gift to be free,
'Tis the gift to come down where we ought to be
And when we find ourselves in the place just right
'Twill be in the valley of love and delight.

When true simplicity is gain'd,
To bow and to bend we will not be asham'd
To turn, turn will be our delight,
Till by turning, turning we come round right